The Dream I Had About My Dad

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The Dream I Had About My Dad

1 May, 2018
JoAnne
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3:38 a.m. April 25, 2018

I was not asleep long. Mom and I had just gotten off the phone around 2:40 a.m. I don’t know what I was dreaming about but I was in the driver’s side of a car (like an old Cadillac) and what appeared like Jacob (from the movie Twilight) appeared without a shirt next to the passenger’s side window. He didn’t say anything and I was afraid. I thought he would hurt me. I asked him, “What are you doing here? What do you want?” He didn’t reply. I do not know if he obsessed with me as in love with me but he seemed obsessed. So I started the car and proceeded forward into what was like a car wash. I knew it was crazy to go in it but I could not go backwards in order to get away from him. Once inside it was like a roller coaster (but in my car)- down, up, around, and I was afraid and thought I might die. I also thought he was chasing me. It was the feeling not that I saw him doing this. I had some type of mask on so I removed it so I could drive, steer and see better. I went downwards and to a place that was like a basement with concrete floors. There was a lot of food stored up there like a pantry in preparation for something. At this point it was almost like I was in a ride and I did not need to control the car…but I could not go fast or slow or stop even if I wanted to. I say this because at one point there was like a mini-altar/shrine to something and I could not read the words quick enough to see what it said but it was as if it was in another language and I did not see my name or anything like that but I was wondering if this was Jacob’s and if it was about me or not but all I know was that it was bad. It was not good. I felt like Jacob was obsessed with me but there was no picture of me. I kept seeing all of this up and down and eventually I was not in a car but up as in up inside above ceiling tiles – the pop up type. I started asking someone who was talking to me but not visible (I do not even know if this person was communicating to me internally meaning without a voice and body). The place where I was had a lot of people. It was very busy, lots of action. There was someone on the ground with a man doing CPR. The man was fat and semi naked but it was not anyone I knew. I asked the person who was with me but not visible, “Where’s Daddy? I want to see my Daddy! I want to see his face.” And then I saw him…he looked exactly like I remember him as a little girl – maybe when I was age 7? He had a suit and tie on and he was working and laughing with people. He looked like the days where he smoked. He was so skinny and he had dark hair and that smile… I saw him walking back and forth with people with what seemed like business papers in his hand. At this point in the dream I knew it was a dream and I was afraid my heart would stop (because of the grief of seeing him again and I could feel it racing) so I tried to move. I tried to open my mouth with my right hand but I was in such a deep sleep that I couldn’t. I couldn’t handle more but I saw him again in the dream….He didn’t see me (either time) but I saw him and wherever he was he looked like he was running the place. He was walking back and forth with people talking and laughing with him but still like he was the boss, papers in his hand and all. I somehow forced myself with my left hand to wake up and used everything in me to pull myself out of the dream and I cried, I wailed. I had to catch my breath and control my heart and my grief. Nick woke up from hearing me like so. I immediately got up and wrote everything down so I would not forget the dream. I went back to bed and told Nick that I saw him. I started crying as I told him the story…

Note: the image in this post is verbatim how I saw my Dad in my dream. I found it a few days after the dream…

 

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